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Post funny news stories in this thread. Try to provide a link to the website where the story was found.

Malaysian State to Offer 'Happy Toilets'

KUALA LUMPUR, Malaysia - A Malaysian state will soon build public toilets equipped with piped music and newspapers for people to enjoy while using the bathroom.

Officials in the northeastern state of Kelantan on Tuesday announced that "Happy and Healthy Toilets" would be built in popular spots, with facilities "guaranteed to make users happy," Malaysia's national news agency Bernama reported.

State public administration official Takiyuddin Hassan said the toilets, to be completed within three months, would have newspapers so that "users can keep up with current issues while performing their business, while being entertained by music."

People would also need to wear special slippers provided in the toilets to maintain hygiene, Takiyuddin was quoted as saying by Bernama.

It was not clear how many such toilets would be constructed.

Source: http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=stor...a_happy_toilets

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I was inspired to create this thread because of this story in "Funny Links" posted by Alibaba126.

Bloomberg News Service]: A terrible diet and a room

with no ventilation are being blamed for the death of a man who was

killed by his own gas emissions. There were no marks on his body, and

an autopsy showed large amounts of methane gas in his system. His diet

had consisted primarily of beans and cabbage (and a couple of other

things). It was just the right combination of foods. It appears that

the man died in his sleep from breathing the poisonous cloud that was

hanging over his bed. Had he been outside or had his windows been

opened, it wouldn't have been fatal. But the man was shut up in his

nearly airtight bedroom. According to the article, "He was a big man

with a huge capacity for creating "this deadly gas." Three of the

rescuers got sick, and one was hospitalized.

lol Laughing Laughing

I should not be laughing at this story because a man lost his life, but is'nt this the silliest story you've ever heard?? Their are bound to be plenty of stories like this out there.

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Guest quasicartes
I was inspired to create this thread because of this story in "Funny Links" posted by Alibaba126.
Bloomberg News Service]: A terrible diet and a room

with no ventilation are being blamed for the death of a man who was

killed by his own gas emissions. There were no marks on his body, and

an autopsy showed large amounts of methane gas in his system. His diet

had consisted primarily of beans and cabbage (and a couple of other

things). It was just the right combination of foods. It appears that

the man died in his sleep from breathing the poisonous cloud that was

hanging over his bed. Had he been outside or had his windows been

opened, it wouldn't have been fatal. But the man was shut up in his

nearly airtight bedroom. According to the article, "He was a big man

with a huge capacity for creating "this deadly gas." Three of the

rescuers got sick, and one was hospitalized.

lol Laughing Laughing

I should not be laughing at this story because a man lost his life, but is'nt this the silliest story you've ever heard?? Their are bound to be plenty of stories like this out there.

Man, if only I was there, I would have lighted my lighter... :evil: :evil: :evil:

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Sex Doll Sparks Bomb Alert at Postoffice

BERLIN (Reuters) - A blow-up sex doll sparked a bomb alert in a German post office after it started to vibrate inside a package awaiting delivery, police said Wednesday.

"Workers were unsettled when it began vibrating and made strange noises," a spokesman for police in the eastern city of Chemnitz said. "They were worried the package might be a bomb."

Officers brought the sender to the scene and discovered the source of alarm was an electrical device inside a life-size female sex doll. The man told police he had wanted to return the doll because it kept turning itself on at the wrong moment.

Order was restored after the sender removed the doll's batteries so the defective product could be returned.

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Burglar Takes Items, but Then Cleans Up

RICHMOND, Va. - A woman's apartment was cleaned out, and cleaned up by a burglar, police said. According to police, the woman returned home Thursday after being away for a week and discovered her television, computer and other items missing. The burglar had also helped himself to food and booze.

But this was not a thoughtless thief. Police said the rear sliding glass door, which the woman had left open, was closed and locked when she returned. In addition, "clothes and dishes had been washed and dried," according to the police report.

Police Capt. Karl Leonard said it's possible the burglar knew the woman was going to be gone for a while and may have decided to take up residence in the interim.

"They probably didn't want to stay in a dirty apartment,' said Leonard, calling the case "very, very unusual."

"We've had burglaries in the past where people have fixed themselves a sandwich," he added. "But nobody's ever done the wash."

Source: http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=stor...ughtful_burglar

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Dog Rejected As Cash Drawing Winner

ABBOTSFORD, B.C. - A gasoline station owner is trying to smooth some ruffled fur over the winner of a cash drawing.

The name on the winning entry, "Mr. Jengels," turned out to be that of a dog owned by Kevin Strybos, who said he used the name of his miniature dachsund-pinscher cross to avoid telemarketers.

Gas station owner Mike Paz said the dog couldn't cash a check and refused to give the $410 to Strybos, who had claimed the winnings.

On Friday, Paz said he would give the money to the local animal shelter run by the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals and offered to hang a portrait of Mr. Jengels on a wall with other cash winners.

Strybos said he appreciated the donation but added, "I don't know if it really changes too much the way I feel about the whole situation."

Source: http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=stor...t/dog_can_t_win

Police advise against lying in the road

VANCOUVER, British Columbia (Reuters) - Police in a Vancouver suburb issued an unusual warning to drivers on Monday: If you run out fuel, do not lay down on the road to get assistance.

Police were alerted to a man's body laying along the Trans Canada Highway in the predawn darkness only to discover he was "quite alive", but that his car had run out of gas and he "wanted to attract someone's attention".

"Guess it worked, but police don't really recommend this method," the Royal Canadian Mounted Police in Burnaby, British Columbia, said in a press release.

The man's car was towed, but no charges were filed.

Source: http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=stor...canada_road&e=2

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Guest quasicartes

Army Commander Beats Officers with Dildo

A Russian army commander has received a two-year suspended sentence after he was found guilty of beating his junior officers with a dildo.

Captain Sergei Imasov was also stripped of his rank and removed from his post.

However, his officers defended him at his military court hearing saying he only hit them lightly with the black latex baton.

Imasov was brought to trial after a soldier, who was himself charged with desertion, told officials he had run away because of nightly beatings from Imasov and his dildo.

Posted by weird on 02/24 at 12:14 PM

Weird News

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  • 3 weeks later...
I was inspired to create this thread because of this story in "Funny Links" posted by Alibaba126.

I should not be laughing at this story because a man lost his life, but is'nt this the silliest story you've ever heard?? Their are bound to be plenty of stories like this out there.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: good stuff ....

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

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http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/2/hi/asia...fic/4252692.stm

Man's static jacket sparks alert

An Australian man built up so much static electricity in his clothes as he walked that he burned carpets, melted plastic and sparked a mass evacuation.

Frank Clewer, of the western Victorian city of Warrnambool, was wearing a synthetic nylon jacket and a woollen shirt when he went for a job interview.

As he walked into the building, the carpet ignited from the 40,000 volts of static electricity that had built up.

"It sounded almost like a firecracker or something like that," he said.

"Within about five minutes, the carpet started to erupt," he told Australian radio.

Considerable current

Perplexed firemen evacuated the building and cut its electricity supply, thinking the burns could have been caused by a power surge.

"There were several scorch marks in the carpet, and we could hear a cracking noise - a bit like a whip - both inside and outside the building," said fire official Henry Barton.

Mr Clewer said that after leaving the building, he scorched a piece of plastic in his car.

His clothes were measured by firemen as carrying an electrical charge of 40,000 volts, the Reuters news agency quoted Mr Barton as saying.

The fire official added that the charge was close to being high enough to cause the items to spontaneously combust.

"I've been firefighting for over 35 years and I've never come across anything like this," he said.

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