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The Totally Spurious Victoria's Secret Thread


TheBaronOfFratton

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TOO MANY "ANGELS"?

So, it's been about an hour since somebody last enquired about "Angel" status and 'who is?' and 'who isn't?' one... But news comes of a fun new take on this incredibly important issue: Are There Too Many "Angels" Now?

It seems that the VS expansion plan has angered the man-on-the-street - and this sudden swell in the ranks is a step too far for us 'fans'. Yeah, I preferred it when it was just the four "Angels" too - Adriana, Alessandra, Heidi, and Adriana. You knew where you were then and everybody liked all of them. Now it's too complicated because there are more names to remember... :doofywave:

But - much as we may hate the focus being taken away from our undisputed favourites - new "Angels" we have got. And it seems opinion is very much in the negative about them:

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LINDA - Ugh, Linda is just too skinny, It's not even funny anymore. That said, I'm going to continue to say Doutzen is fat without any trace of irony because that's a bit beyond me. What's with this skinny trend? I prefer a full-figured girl in lingerie. Have you noticed how fat Doutzen is? It's terrible!

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ROSE - She's such an effing dog! How can anybody think she's pretty? Hey, don't hate me because that's just my opinion and that's ALLOWED. :yes:Ale is the most beautiful girl in the world, FACT - and you can't disagree... Wait a minute, did I derail my own argument? Ummm... God, Rose is such a dog, I hope VS ditch her for someone we can all like...

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DIOR - Blah... She's so plain. I mean it's totally obvious that Dior only got an "Angel" contract because she's blue. I don't want to sound racist - but, somehow, I'm just going to dig myself deeper into this hole. I mean, like, some of my best friends are blue.

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Baron you forgot the new VS "It" Girl Neytiri ... She's so blue&skinny, i saw a couple of her lingerie shoots & she's not my cup of tea but anyways

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My mom just told me that my grandma told her that she heard that Neytiry will be on the X-Mas Catalogue Cover, open the VSFS 2010, wear the Fantasy Bra -that is goin' to be white to match w/her skin of course- & she's even goin' to sing w/Ed Razek in the show.

She's the new Heidi Klum!

Please textlink or upload images onto a host instead of hotlinking. For more information click HERE. Thanks! ~post edited by PinkCouture

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Baron you forgot the new VS "It" Girl Neytiri ... She's so blue&skinny, i saw a couple of her lingerie shoots & she's not my cup of tea but anyways
^ :thumbsup:

Ach, I guess if she was a dog too (but, I suppose, she's more of cat-type thing, no?) then she'd combine all 3 standout qualities of our new "Angels"!

Looking forward to her duet - but I do so hope Seal gets to join in at some point... <_<

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This is gnna be crap,but whateever:

MAJOR TRADIGY :

A up- and coming new model called nandice poleswane has fallen to her death. The model was at a fitting for the new "Lighter then Heaven" wing range for chain store Victoria secret, the wings were attached by pinning them to her outfit. During the photoshoot the photographer asked the model to climb onto a ledge on the end of the building-telling her that it was perfectly safe..unfortunatley,she slipped and landed head-first on the concrete (the wings were intact)

In a bid to save face,Victoria secret has issued a statement saying that they are going to change the name "Lighter then Heaven" as medics who later tested the body said the cause of death was by a force pulling her down.

R.I.P.

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  • 1 month later...

Baron ... Do you know what is goin' to change? Are ALL the other models goin' to be fired? (except Alessandra of course!) ... No more Supermodels/Bombshells/Spokemodels? No more contracted girls? No more models search? Is the war goin' to an end?

& ... is she really back this time? are you sure?

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^Oh SHE'S BACK alright. BACK - in case you hadn't heard! :whistle:Thank goodness, eh?

Ja, you know, I'm sure that VS will actually celebrate this in some tedious way... But my issue was with all that self-important bluster and po-faced hysteria (from certain quarters) about - essentially - a woman returning from maternity leave! <_<

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