What's your sexual orientation?
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You guys are actually only the 'third person' I've told about it
What did the other two people say?
They're both very good (female) friends. One of them is 'obsessed' with gays
And happily for me they were both shocked at first (of course) but were really happy I told them and they accept me. For them it makes no difference (as it doesn't make any for me).
They were so cute
"
That made me really happy
Glad to hear that you have friends to help you out...
Thanks for the nice replies you two!
Yeah, I'm really glad I have them... but I still haven't told any male friend not even my best male friend for 12 years. That is probably going to be awkward. I don't think he's really homophobic but he can be a bit of a jerk sometimes... So we'll see.
I would think the hardest would be to tell is your parents. I had really good friends that were gay and out of seven close friends only one had her mother accept her. It helped that her mother was bi-sexual, most parents love their children no matter what. Parents do come around eventually, but the first reaction or more so not knowing what the first reaction will be makes it hard to let them know. I don't know if that would be an issue for you, but I would recommend not to one day show up with a boyfriend and say this is my life partner. My best friend got disowned doing that, his parents never really came around to accepting him or his choices. And now I kind of understand why...Even if you were to show up with a woman and say this is my wife, it could hurt a parent. I know really it's none of my business but I just thought I would put my two cents in.
That is always the risk when you decide to live out in the open. I have friends that have been estranged from thier families because they decided to come out. Coming out is an incredibly traumatic affair to some, because there is always a risk that you will lose family and friends.
With the exception of my father who I am already estranged from, my family was incredibly supportive of me. I did lose a couple of friends over it, but you can make a compelling argument that they were never friends to begin with. My partner became estranged from her mother when she came out, which was especially painful in that she was an only child. But my family quickly adopted her into ours, she likes having brothers and sisters now.
But whether you are gay, straight or bi. Never be afraid to live true to yourself. Pretending to be something else to make others happy will just end in hurt feelings for all involved.
Thanks for all the nice advise and sympathy.
I really appreciate it. I mean it's not like I'm totally down right now but I am going through mood changes all the time lately...
Yeah, I don't really know yet when and how to tell them... I read some 'coming-out do's and don'ts' or however you might call it but I still don't really know what to expect. Because my family actually is pretty open I think but I think it's a difference being open towards others or when it 'affects' your own. The premises are a bit devided i think. My mom is always like 'I really should have put you into ballett classes when you were little you would have made such a dancer' (no I don't want to do ballett and I don't know what gave her the impression I might have ever wanted ) 'hey stylist, should I wear this blouse or this one?' So she allready treats me lin a stereotypical way like I am gay, but maybe she doesn't realise that because I mean I am very interested in fashion, I do have an eye for what looks good (I mean I'm an artist so I should have ) and I'm good at girly stuff like advising my little sisters in fashion questions or listening to people. My sister even asked me to do her hair for the ball they were having from her dancing course. Maybe my mother knows but I think it will still be a shock for her. And my dad I can't really evaluate because he is a teacher for civics and therefore really open I think but on the other hand I'm the eldest and only son (I have two sisters) so that might be quite depressing like 'oh no I wasn't able to raise a son' or something like that. But as I said with him I really don't know. And the problem is he teaches at my school lol so as soon as I tell anyone beside my closest friends or anyone besides them finds out there will be gossiping and stuff and sooner or later he'll get it so I have to tell my parents first I think. But since I'm not having a boyfirend who might be to blame but I just am homosexual it just shouldn't matter I think. I'm gay but I'm still the same I was beforeand I think for people in school it is just not relevant what sexuality I have but they might not get that.
In one of these 'do's and don'ts' there was something about not coming out if you're dependent on your parents (in terms of money) which makes me a bit insecure because if my parents would cut me off I would totally be lost (I don't think my parents would ever do something like that no matter what one of us kids did or how different to their expectations one of us was but it's still an eventuality). That actually worries me. Okay coming out to my parents as a whole worries me
Do you have like any general tips, LadySith?
And thanks again for the support.
I will try my best to help.
I read alot of those 'coming out' books too. If anything they just tended to fill me with more anxiety and dread about the whole thing.
Doing what many people qualify as 'stereotypical' gay behavior. Boy do I understand you there! I was always a tomboy growing up, hanging out with the guys, playing sports and such. Didn't even shock my parents that much when I opted to join the Marine Corps before going to college. As for your eye for fashion, embrace it as a gift that it is. I know a few artists gay and straight, its the eye for colors and textures there. Not sexuality.
While it may not be easy, and it may fill you with anxiety. Just be honest with those you care about. I come from a law enforcement family, (I used to be a cop myself for nine years.) believe me, you could not just get anything past them! When I did finally come out to my family my brother laughed and said. "Yeah, we've known for a long time, just wondered when you were going to tell us." You can imagine the relief that I felt. After hearing so many horror stories about coming out experiences.
I can understand about being apprehensive about the whole thing. It is a great unknown. But instead of just dropping the whole thing at once, you might want to have a few conversations about things with them first. Like for instance, if you see a Gay Rights issue on the news or in the paper, ask their opinions on the whole matter. If it becomes a debate, present a clear concise, logical argument. (That should appeal to your father.) Don't let it become heated or personal. Just an exchange of ideas. Ask them their opinions on gay issues and find out what they are.
I think that your parents will love you and support you, they sound very open-minded from what you have said. I didn't come out until I had graduated from college and had been living on my own for a few years. But I know the feelings you have and what is going through your mind. I remember what a truly agonizing time that can be. You just want to stand on the roof and scream "I"M GAY! SO WHAT!" If for nothing else than to just get it over with.
I'm definately straight.
Really I would like to be a gay. Life is so much more easy with guys ! Women drives me grazy ! Really I dont understand....
Unfortunately I like their looks and pussy... 
^^
One guy that I know told his best friend that he's gay and he took it ok, but he never sits next to him on a couch now! 
Also, 1 year ago, one friend of mine told me that she's a lesbian! I freaked out but after a couple of days it was ok. I don't have any problems with her because she's a nice girl and we're laughing a lot!
M---, I guess what I'm trying to say is that when you tell the person(s) that you want about you, just give them time to "swallow" it... don't expect them to say "sure, ok, no problem" in the first 10 seconds! 
If they like you for who you are, then they will still remain your friends
good luck!
Really I would like to be a gay. Life is so much more easy with guys ! Women drives me grazy ! Really I dont understand....Unfortunately I like their looks and pussy...
Really I would like to be a gay. Life is so much more easy with guys ! Women drives me grazy ! Really I dont understand....Unfortunately I like their looks and pussy...
the only reason you don't understand us women is we speak different languages.... LOL I have to ask are you a Venusian or Martian...
driving each other crazy only can add axcitement to a relationship.. so strap in and enjoy the ride.... LOL
[quote
Summed me up at that time. Right now I still haven't told anybody else but I'm way calmer about me and everything. I think I just needed some time to get it to sink in into my own consciousness before I could tell anybody else.
I think I might soon.
One guy that I know told his best friend that he's gay and he took it ok, but he never sits next to him on a couch now!
One guy that I know told his best friend that he's gay and he took it ok, but he never sits next to him on a couch now!
One guy that I know told his best friend that he's gay and he took it ok, but he never sits next to him on a couch now!That's horrible, maybe even more horrible than being immediately rejected. I would feel really bad if I was in his situation. It's like"Well, it's okay that you're gay. Cool...but...you know...it's okay as long as you don't talk to me and touch me anymore"
I LIKE MEN!
i hope to meet a nice model boy like myself to fall in love with one day 
I LIKE MEN!i hope to meet a nice model boy like myself to fall in love with one day
I am straight
and I am going to make M--- straight too 
:evil:
I am straightand I am going to make M--- straight too