Does your GF/BF's Sexual past really bother you?

I think the perception of how each role and expectations people play in ones life has a lot to do with someone's experiences and the initial foundations of their life..

someone might accept a friend by who they are today and a past may not matter. As friends the baggage that comes with mistakes or choices doesnt effect the deep part of the heart so stepping back to help and care for this person can be done at a safer level. So the boundaries someone may have for someone as the role of friend can be broader.

BUT when you begin to talk about love, LOVERS, or spouses, their is a deeper bond. this role is dealing with every piece of the baggage and the expectations for this role can more to protect one self from having more baggage of their own or even being able to take on someone elses; and some factors for boundaries can be based on moral beliefs or personalities.

I mind. My boyfriend lost his virginity at 18 to a woman twice his age. He also slept/dated webcam girls, a couple.... it bothers me sometimes... especially since he's actually a shy guy. So it makes me wonder what he had to be on for all of that to happen. Sad part is that I know he's not lying because his mom's intervention was the reason he broke up with the old one, the other two... well there's a longer underlying reason I wouldn't doubt it. He doesn't brag about it, but it just gives me the creeps.

It might be a dumb question, but what exactly is it that bothers you about the fact that he lost his virginity to an older woman?

he was obsessed with her for a year... she was a married woman... etc. I don't know, it just bothers me... it's not a conventional way of losing it and I've always been annoyed by milf stories. I'm a bit younger than him - I can't have the experience of being more experienced with him. I usually date guys a little younger than me (or at least that's what I'm use to) and I'm always more experienced some how lol

I think the perception of how each role and expectations people play in ones life has a lot to do with someone's experiences and the initial foundations of their life..

someone might accept a friend by who they are today and a past may not matter. As friends the baggage that comes with mistakes or choices doesnt effect the deep part of the heart so stepping back to help and care for this person can be done at a safer level. So the boundaries someone may have for someone as the role of friend can be broader.

BUT when you begin to talk about love, LOVERS, or spouses, their is a deeper bond. this role is dealing with every piece of the baggage and the expectations for this role can more to protect one self from having more baggage of their own or even being able to take on someone elses; and some factors for boundaries can be based on moral beliefs or personalities.

and some factors for boundaries can be based on moral beliefs or personalities.

It's not about their sexual past bothering me but about being compatible. If your BF/GF doesn't feel the same way about sex and sexual relationships as you do, then there is some incompatibility there. You cant have a wild child/very sexual person and a prudish virgin being together. That only works in romance novels and not in real life.

Totally agree with that. To me the affectionate part is more important then the overly sexual part (not saying the two can't go well together), so if a guy or girl (being bisexual) has had tens of other guys or girls that comes along with a different set of mind on the topic of sexuality. I wouldn't be sure if he or she would then be willing to lay low with me or that he just sees as a temporary pleasure or cheat to get his sexual pleasure like he or she has had before and I, being more prude then average, am not giving.

Not that I'm really the jealous type, but I would find such people harder to trust then if their past has shown them to be a bit more of a reliable factor.

I deffinately think that your more disenclined to feel secure if you know your partner has cheated in the past. I had trouble trusting my Ex because she cheated on her previous boyfriend with Me. My Hypocrisy knows no limit.

My partner's sexual past is irrelevant to me. What matters is here and now, right?