PinkCouture
10880 replies · 156608 views
Owwww....I am so sorry 
I hope you restore your bowel movement soon 
thanks 
it's not often that i'm full of shit...despite rumors to the contrary :|
"Cause I found a way, to steal the suns of the sky"
One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him,
"My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a
doctor."
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.
"There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a
urine
sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it.
It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars . . . A lot cheaper than a doctor."
So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to
Wal-Mart.
He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.
Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:
"You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart"
Th at evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was,Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure.
Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He
deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.
The computer prints the following:
1. Your tap water is too hard Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle
7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never
get
better!
Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart
"Cause I found a way, to steal the suns of the sky"
for me? 
One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him,
"My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a
doctor."
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.
"There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a
urine
sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it.
It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars . . . A lot cheaper than a doctor."
So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to
Wal-Mart.
He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.
Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:
"You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart"
Th at evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was,Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure.
Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He
deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.
The computer prints the following:
1. Your tap water is too hard Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle
7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never
get
better!
Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart
Where do you find this stuff?
one of my buddies posted it as a bulletin on My Space
Ahhhh...ok
"Cause I found a way, to steal the suns of the sky"
for me?
sure 
Thx 
I read it online somewhere like two days ago.
Gorgeous girl.
I have a buddy who looks just like Keanu. (Bill and Ted era)
It was so bad, that at a lot of the places and bars we hung out during college, the bartenders and waitresses would refer to him as "Keanu".
did they ask for his autograph or a photo with him? was he flattered? 
It was more a way of teasing him. 
But actually, it did start a lot of conversations. People would remember his face, and stuff like that.
I agree w/ you, except that part abt. Sandra. I think she is a pretty good actress. Not the best, but much better compare to so many other actresses outthere
yay u think she's a good actress
It was more a way of teasing him.But actually, it did start a lot of conversations. People would remember his face, and stuff like that.
I understand now
Did anyone use any cheesy movie lines on him?
It was more a way of teasing him.
But actually, it did start a lot of conversations. People would remember his face, and stuff like that.
I understand now
Did anyone use any cheesy movie lines on him?
All the time.
Mostly Bill and Ted stuff. It actually broke the ice with a lot of people.
All the time.Mostly Bill and Ted stuff. It actually broke the ice with a lot of people.
I haven't seen that movie in ages 
(note to self: hire Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure)
Trash can... remember the trash can!
All the time.
Mostly Bill and Ted stuff. It actually broke the ice with a lot of people.
I haven't seen that movie in ages
Trash can... remember the trash can!
That and Ferris Bueller's day off and the first Back to the Future are classics to anyone who grew up during the 80s.
That and Ferris Bueller's day off and the first Back to the Future are classics to anyone who grew up during the 80s.
Ferris Bueller's day off 
I love that movie. Back to the future movies were ok was the Breakfast club shown during the 80s? 
That was pretty good
That and Ferris Bueller's day off and the first Back to the Future are classics to anyone who grew up during the 80s.
Ferris Bueller's day off
Yep, that's another one of those 80s classic. You could always count Fast times at Ridgemont high as well, but that never was one of my favorites.
Interesting how the male stars of those movies (Keanu Reeves, Sean Penn, Matthew Broderick) still have succesfull careers, while the female stars of those same movies (Mia Sara, Phoebe Cates, Molly Ringwald) have slowly withered away into obscurity.