The Totally Spurious Victoria's Secret Thread Pinned

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not with a BANG but a whimper...'s avatar
not with a BANG but a whimper...
Posts: 10268
#81
Not only her contract my friend, but her empire as a whole is expanding faster than the universe. Case in point her film career is on the rise as my sources tell me that Adriana Lima is scheduled to play Gypsey Vampiress Mirela Petulengro in one of the upcoming Twilight prequels .
Oh lawdy - make it stop!!! I'd say: get a wooden stake, fast, but I suspect she'd be a "special" vampire with "special" powers and she won't be affected by something as common as that... post-11221-0-1446084893-55038_thumb.gif

You see, I'm noticing a trend where Adriana's concerned!

Matching sets are for girls...with cooties!'s avatar
Matching sets are for girls...with cooties!
Posts: 17410
#82

Its rumored Belarusian model Maryna Linchuk was deeply disapointed about not getting the role and that she had her heart set on playing Mirela Petulengro

post-17304-0-1446084899-00332_thumb.jpg.

In a ratio interview, the famous activist Al Sharpton mentioned affirmative action and racial discrimination on the grounds of Maryna being too light skinned for the character and that the Twilight franchise should be sued...

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But an anonymous friend of the model says its all idle gossip and that Maryna not only has no plans of sueing the franchise, but is only happy for her fashion collegue .

Ninjas in Paris's avatar
Ninjas in Paris
Posts: 3763
#83

Meet R-in Heatherton:

Come on VS... Was it that hard to put an E behind Erin?

On a side note, only the Angels are shown backstage, the Pink Girl and the Supermodels are shown on the runway.

not with a BANG but a whimper...'s avatar
not with a BANG but a whimper...
Posts: 10268
#84

^That sounds like you're cooking up a whole host of conspiracy theories there!

I fully endorse that ( ) - no more factual than that 'official' nonsense... Yeah, 'R' for Erin - did you knot goes to skool?

From Miami With Love's avatar
From Miami With Love
Posts: 5395
#85
^That sounds like you're cooking up a whole host of conspiracy theories there!

I fully endorse that ( ) - no more factual than that 'official' nonsense... Yeah, 'R' for Erin - did you knot goes to skool?

YOU SPELLED SCHOOL RONG!!!!

not with a BANG but a whimper...'s avatar
not with a BANG but a whimper...
Posts: 10268
#86

NEW FROM VICTORIA'S SECRET: THE MIRANDA KERR LOVE-DOLL

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Tired of constant jibes that your "Angel" looks like a little girl - and therefore your liking of her is tantamount to liking children? Sick of every Miranda promotion/appearance being followed by loads of posts about child-pornography?? Tired of being called a creepy 'paedo'??? Well, cock-a-snook and flip those interfering do-gooders the bird with the ALL-NEW (in no way creepy and doesn't look anything like a little girl) MIRANDA KERR LOVE-DOLL!!!

What are people's minds like, eh? Thinking that you liking little Manda-Panda is a bit dodgy... <_< Screw them! And if you're not Orlando (in no way a nonce) Bloom, then this doll is the doll for you.

Go online now to choose how you want to dress the cutie-pie. It's not weird at all. And choose from all the very respectable and healthy, and in no way suspect, costumes for your Love-Doll to wear:

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There's the 'school-girl' outfit, the 'school-girl-nurse' outfit, the 'school-girl-stripper' outfit, and the 'school-girl-french-maid' outfit. I'm sure you'll agree that's something for everyone..? Accessorise her with ribbons for her pig-tails, some glittery make-up, or maybe a lollipop - the choices are endless!

And then she's all yours. No need to worry about Bloom, Australian financial managers looking over your shoulder, or those Bellazon snobs who think your favourites are not as good as theirs - and therefore slightly odd. What do they know?!! Idiots...

Enjoy!!!

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(Coming soon: Erin Heatherton and Behati Prinsloo models)

Ninjas in Paris's avatar
Ninjas in Paris
Posts: 3763
#87

So stoopid. I wanted a Lindsay Ellingson one. And you could like, dress it up as a cow girl, the little red riding hood, a black white widow, put feathers on her head...

not with a BANG but a whimper...'s avatar
not with a BANG but a whimper...
Posts: 10268
#88
So stoopid. I wanted a Lindsay Ellingson one. And you could like, dress it up as a cow girl, the little red riding hood, a black white widow, put feathers on her head...
^ Wait - I think she'll be in the third-wave of releases. VS are just naturally cautious after the thousands of unsold Tickle-Me Kylie Bisutti dolls ended up as landfill or in one of those attempts to plug the oil-spill...
Matching sets are for girls...with cooties!'s avatar
Matching sets are for girls...with cooties!
Posts: 17410
#89

Is it true that Chanel's has the kung fu grip and Doutzen's has the sleeper hold ?

not with a BANG but a whimper...'s avatar
not with a BANG but a whimper...
Posts: 10268
#90

MIRANDA KERR AND ORLANDO BLOOM MARRY: FIRST PICTURE

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Kerr and Bloom marry in LA yesterday, service conducted by Jerry Garcia - or maybe Santa...

(Details probably to follow)

♥Whispers On The Wind, Push Me Onward♥'s avatar
♥Whispers On The Wind, Push Me Onward♥
Posts: 25154
#91

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Gifs by me but of course gif provided by sim

Meet R-in Heatherton:

Come on VS... Was it that hard to put an E behind Erin?

On a side note, only the Angels are shown backstage, the Pink Girl and the Supermodels are shown on the runway.

Ninjas in Paris's avatar
Ninjas in Paris
Posts: 3763
#92

Remember Angels Across America?

Well Victoria's Secret is doing it again! Get ready for:

Incredibles Across Canada! Or at least Across VS Stores.

Come join us as we celebrate VS going global. Come meet Candice, Rosie, Chanel, Candice, Erin and Candice in Yorkdale Dec 2, West Edmonton Mall Dec 4, Square One Shopping Centre Dec 6 and Toronto Eaton Dec 8. You can also take part in a special contest to get a lesson in how to dress to get a guy's attention courtesy of everybody's fave Incredible Candice Swanepoel, slutty lingerie and a lot of other Incredible *wink wink, nudge nudge* prizes.

Come awt here, VS's Incredibles are waiting for you!

Bregje Heine(ke)n's avatar
Bregje Heine(ke)n
Posts: 30596
#93

Lol

not with a BANG but a whimper...'s avatar
not with a BANG but a whimper...
Posts: 10268
#94

(You make a very valid point Siemgi - she might be everybody's favourite (VS FACT), but a worrying trend is developing... )

CANDICE VIRUS SET TO TAKE OVER THE INTERNET

In January 2008 Candice pictures took up 1.5% of the Victoria's Secret website

In August 2010 Candice pictures took up 62% of the Victoria's Secret website

At this rate Candice pictures will fill the website by February 2011, and the ENTIRE internet by September of that same year...*

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You might have noticed the exponential rate Candice pictures are post-11221-0-1446084965-43507_thumb.jpg cluttering up the VS website? Hell, it must have come to something when you can't rely on seeing that gurning fool Adriana at every given moment - what's up with that?!! Apparently it's not 'malware', just VS's latest campaign of over-saturation to the point where a (personal) former favourite is FORCED post-11221-0-1446084965-46055_thumb.jpg down your throat to the point of inducing vomiting any given time you see her.

post-11221-0-1446084965-47094_thumb.jpgpost-11221-0-1446084965-48862_thumb.jpg It's a curious tactic - and one you'd think they'd learnt from before when some people have expressed a certain ennui at the barrage of Klum and Lima before her (Adriana's stil the best though, Adriana's still the best pbuh...) post-11221-0-1446084965-52442_thumb.jpg

Despite not even having hallowed "Angel" status. VS seems incapable post-11221-0-1446084965-54127_thumb.jpg of performing any sort of function without her gummy smile adorning every fucking second of it: Want a store opening? Call Candice. Want a product launch? Call post-11221-0-1446084965-55899_thumb.jpg Candice. Want a picture of Alessandra Ambrosio? Call Candice. Want to know next weeks NFL results? Call Candice. post-11221-0-1446084965-58107_thumb.jpgpost-11221-0-1446084965-5974_thumb.jpg

Infact, it's getting increasingly hard to write about anything to do with VS without it referring to Candice. This thread used to be fun for equal-opportunity ribbing of post-11221-0-1446084965-61569_thumb.jpg all the various VS models; but, frankly, there only seems to be the one now... So what are we to do?

post-11221-0-1446084965-62689_thumb.jpgpost-11221-0-1446084965-65692_thumb.jpgpost-11221-0-1446084965-67998_thumb.jpgfreescaredsmileys366.gif

post-11221-0-1446084965-71957_thumb.jpg I mean, it's getting kind of hard to type even. And it's threatening to post-11221-0-1446084965-74537_thumb.jpg take over the whole internet even! WE MUST TRY TO STOP THIS!

post-11221-0-1446084965-7545_thumb.jpgpost-11221-0-1446084965-78016_thumb.jpg Zombie blondes may be your thing, who am I to judge? Just, well, let's have some variation VS. We'll love you more for it - PROMISE!

post-11221-0-1446084965-80768_thumb.jpg Just cut down on Candice a little. I like her, sure. BUT MY EYES ARE BURNING... post-11221-0-1446084965-82548_thumb.jpg

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(*Don't bother with the maths muppet - spurious!)

Ninjas in Paris's avatar
Ninjas in Paris
Posts: 3763
not with a BANG but a whimper...'s avatar
not with a BANG but a whimper...
Posts: 10268
#96
All this thread is FACT...
Just remember, Biden wasn't elected. He was installed's avatar
Just remember, Biden wasn't elected. He was installed
Posts: 59820
#97

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Barron that thar is a WIN post if ever I saw one!

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not with a BANG but a whimper...'s avatar
not with a BANG but a whimper...
Posts: 10268
#98

^Aw Pretty, since your explanation I have new found love for that "FFFFUUUU" guy (and thanks for the WIN)! And that sums it up: JUST SPREAD THE LOVE VS. We had that Who Is Victoria? shit a couple of years ago - seems fairly obvious now that the answer is Candice! <_<

anjelina's avatar
anjelina
Posts: 822
#99

OMG!!!!

the lima stuff is crazy and im loving it!!!!

finally this bitch gets some of what she deserves!!!

damn it lima, how did VS survive without you for one year???

Clauds's avatar
Clauds
Posts: 25637
#100
^Aw Pretty, since your explanation I have new found love for that "FFFFUUUU" guy (and thanks for the WIN)! And that sums it up: JUST SPREAD THE LOVE VS. We had that Who Is Victoria? shit a couple of years ago - seems fairly obvious now that the answer is Candice! <_<

You're wrong Baron ... Didn't you know that from now & on they changed the name to Candice's Secret?

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