Stormbringer

Yeah, I knew that  

Edit: ooooh it's

100 PAGES!!!

Do you like Weezer?

If you have any knowledge about these genres, this is awesome   

I found it in Spanish, so I'm translating it:

The Princess, the Dragon... and Metal   

The situation is as follow: a princess is being kept prisoner in a castle guarded by a terrifying dragon. How would the solution be for each sub-genre of Metal in front of such a situation? (There's some non-Metal Rock genres on this too)

Power Metal

Our protagonist arrives to the castle riding a white horse, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and they run far away and make love.

TRUE Metal

The protagonist arrives to the castle and defeats the dragon using his sword. After this and bathed in the dragon's blood he has sex with the princess.

Thrash Metal

Our protagonist reaches the castle drunk and riding his skateboard, sets up a mosh pit and elbows the dragon. Then he has a drink with the princess, fucks her, then takes a piss on the dragon and passes out drunk.

Heavy Metal

The protagonist gets to the castle on his Harley Davidson motorbike, kills the dragon, has a couple of beers with the princess and then they have sex.

Folk Metal

Our main character comes with various friends playing accordion, fiddles, lute and other weird instruments. The dragon falls asleep after too much dancing, and then they leave... without the princess.

Viking Metal (How awesome is that as I'm writing this Amon Amarth comes on shuffle!!  )

The protagonist comes on a vessel, kills the dragon with his axe, cooks it and then eats it. He then rapes the princess, plunders the castle and sets it all on fire before leaving.

Death Metal

The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess, kills her and leave.

Black Metal

Our main character arrives at dawn amidst a fog that reminds us of Norway's mountains in winter. He then kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle, sodomizes the princess and cuts her with a dagger to drink her blood in a ritual before killing her. After finding out she wasn't a virgin, he impales her beside the dragon.

Doom Metal

Our protagonist comes to the castle, sees the size of dragon, gets depressed and kills himself. The dragon eats his corpse and then eats the princess.

Nu Metal

He comes to the castle and brags about how good he is at fighting and how he is capable of defeating the dragon. He loses miserably...

He then runs away and finds the princess. Then he tells her about his tragic infancy, his parents's divorce and how he was bullied at school. The princess slaps him in the face and leave. Our "Nu" guy takes a prozac and goes making a new record.

Classic Rock

He arrives on a motorcycle smoking a joint, which he offers to the dragon, who turns out to be a friend. He then camps with the princess on the farthest corner of the backyard and after lots of sex, drugs and rock n' roll has an overdose and dies suffocated in his own vomit.

Progressive

He reaches the castle, and a guitar virtuoso as he is, plays an incredible 26 minutes guitar solo. The dragon kills itself after such tedious. Our protagonist finds the princess and plays another solo exploring every technique and time signatures learned at the conservatory.

The princess runs away with the thrasher.

Hard Rock

He arrives to the castle on a red convertible with two blondes with big boobs drinking a bottle of Jack Daniels. He proceeds to kill the dragon with a knife and then has an orgy with the blondes and the princess.

Glam (Wonderful... as I write this now STEEL PANTHER comes on shuffle  )

The glammer reaches the castle and the dragon laughs so damn much at seeing him that he lets him pass. The protagonist enters the castle and steals the princess' hairspray and lipstick.

He then convinces the dragon to paint the castle pink.

Punk

He throws a stone at the dragon and runs. He then paints the "A" of Anarchy on the castle walls. He does the princess a punk haircut and opens a newsstand where he sells fanzines in the castles hallways.

Goth Metal

He arrives dressed on the latest trend of night clothes but is unsure of wether he wants to enter the castle or not, or wanting to face the dragon for that matter, or if he actually likes princesses at all. At such uncertainties he picks the first rose he finds in the surroundings and bleeds out by the thorns.

Metal Core

The dude arrives jumping like a pogo in front of the dragon. He threatens it with these horrid yells to then kick the dragon and perform growls on a crab stance to finally kill it by choking it with his skinny jeans. He comes to the princess, caresses her and tells her some nostalgic phrases with a ballad-like voice. They make love, but then he kills her after finding out she cheated on him before knowing him.

Gore Metal

He arrives and kills the dragon. He then enters the castle, fucks the princess and kills her. Then he fucks her again. Then he burns the princess' body... and fucks her again.

Brutal Death Metal

The protagonist kills the princess, takes out her guts, chew some of them and throws the rest on the dragon to then sodomize it.

Grindcore  

The protagonist arrives with surgical equipment, stabs the dragon to death, opens it's stomach and masturbates inside the dragon's entrails. He then goes to the princess, beheads her and fucks the place where he made the cut as he kisses the head. He lets some time pass and when both bodies are rotting he fucks them again.

@RIP_Cabrini_Green, @Prettyphile, @Stromboli1, @Limerlight, @SuperG.Girl

3 minutes ago, Stromboli1 said:

Do you like Weezer?

I kinda like them, yes. They're good. But not really a fan either.

4 hours ago, Stormbringer said:

Yeah, I knew that  

 

Edit: ooooh it's

 

100 PAGES!!!

  

Time to bring out the Ramitas sir!  

And I have yet to get all caught up with ur videos sir

3 hours ago, Stormbringer said:

The Princess, the Dragon... and Metal   

 

5 hours ago, Stormbringer said:

Edit: ooooh it's

 

100 PAGES!!!

  

congrats dude!   

7 hours ago, ILUVAdrianaLima said:

 

Time to bring out the Ramitas sir!  

 

And I have yet to get all caught up with ur videos sir

Or a pizza maybe?  

Get on to it then!  

8 hours ago, SuperG.Girl said:

 

 

 

congrats dude!   

Hard Rock is possibly the best, along Heavy Metal   

Thank you!!  

9 hours ago, Stormbringer said:

 

Or a pizza maybe?  

 

Get on to it then!  

Pizza does sound better or maybe a nice giant burger at Carl's Jr?

Will do! Hey I wonder, for your area, what type of fish do u usually buy for lunch/dinner?

That was a funny list.

3 hours ago, ILUVAdrianaLima said:

 

Pizza does sound better or maybe a nice giant burger at Carl's Jr?

 

Will do! Hey I wonder, for your area, what type of fish do u usually buy for lunch/dinner?

That's another good possibility... but I already went there 2 days ago  

I usually get salmon, or hake. More rarely conger. But for a country with such a coastline as this, fish is surprisingly expensive in Santiago. The difference in price compared to coastal cities is big and it's not like we're that far away from the sea here...

I guess you could wait a few more days then

Ya it really is with such a vast and long coastline! But heck, the second u go just a few dozen km away from the coast, the logistics of hauling around that fish is shown in the cost asap Why I drive to the coast for good seafood, just makes it worth while How's the conger by the way, curious on that? I've been purchasing a lot of yellowtail tuna lately.

Yes, that's true. But still in Osorno for example fish is not that expensive and the distance from the coast is pretty much the same.

Conger is great here!  But I don't find it too often in Santiago.

Tuna has never been of my favorites actually  

.

On 3/31/2017 at 5:25 AM, Stormbringer said:

Yes, that's true. But still in Osorno for example fish is not that expensive and the distance from the coast is pretty much the same.

Conger is great here!  But I don't find it too often in Santiago.

 

Tuna has never been of my favorites actually  

Hmm, wonder why the premium then?

I see u like eel quite a bit eh? I love it here as well when I order my sushi Especially with that sweet sauce on it

Why I prefer the fattier cuts, more flavor and delectable

14 minutes ago, ILUVAdrianaLima said:

 

Hmm, wonder why the premium then?

I see u like eel quite a bit eh? I love it here as well when I order my sushi Especially with that sweet sauce on it

 

Why I prefer the fattier cuts, more flavor and delectable

 

After some asking, the price isn't that much different actually. That's on supermarkets though... those are the ones ripping us off  But it's the closest I have to buy fish...

Well, I like conger indeed, but I don't think I've had other eels. And sushi is definitely not my thing  

Was anybody missing the high pitched vocals?  

@FashionDream suggested me doing something by Aerosmith and this song was the preferred option. If I remember correctly, @katchitup was also enthusiastic about something by Aerosmith.

@SuperG.Girl also wanted to hear this  

So, here it is: 

DREAM ON

I hope you like it!  (And I hope not to break any glasses  )

^ Oh jeez, I know this song and just reading the title has my windows cracking

16 minutes ago, ILUVAdrianaLima said:

^ Oh jeez, I know this song and just reading the title has my windows cracking

I'm planning recording a song that goes even higher  

Just listened to Dream On and man, great guitar work once again bud! Really enjoyed this one a great deal! 

And ekk, I held on to my seat at 3:30 and held on tight Thankfully all my glassware is still in one piece Nice note hits there amigo!