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On 12/17/2017 at 11:36 AM, 17 Moments of Spring said:
that second chapter seems preliminary, but has some profound message too. buddhism sees emotions like ever-changing weather. accordingly, it's no use to cling to any of them. thoughts are the same. the first step is to shove out from them. to learn to consider ourselves as an observer, and not as a participant in the stage of emotions and thoughts.
as for the "games people play" book, on the surface it's about communication too, but there's much more to it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nKNyFSLJy6o&t=4m11s
Spoiler
Reveal hidden contents
I just downloaded the audiobook for "Games People Play" ( 6 and half hours). Sounds intriguing and it's a classic book. Thanks for the recommendation. The Female/Male brain books were terrific..
Yes, that concept of Buddhism is called "observing ego" in psychology. I think it is useful to learn how to use one's emotions to productive ends rather than trying to minimize their impact. Monks are the only ones that can afford to be monotone all the time..
I tried listening to "The Power of Now" over the summer (by spiritual teacher, Eckhart Tolle). It had good insights but I the rest I either found psychobabble (I didn't know what the hell he was talking about) and I lost interest about 2/3rds in.
I am currently listening to the "nonviolent communication training". I think the essence of this is taking the energy that fuels hurt/unsatisfied needs that, in turn, fuel anger and channeling it more productive communication.
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Eliza Cummings
Rozanne Verduin
Christine Sofie Johansen
Amber Davis
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Clara McSweeney
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When did you get the financial guru tag?
I finished "nonviolent communication training" and I had immediate results at a situation yesterday.
I'm going out for the weekend and will either tackle the workshop or Brene Brown's stuff (have no idea if it's good or if i'd like it)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brené_Brown
her TED talk
My halftime review of "The Power of Vulnerability" (50%) by Brene Brown.
"Brené Brown (born November 18, 1965) is a research professor at the University of Houston where she holds the Huffington Foundation – Brené Brown Endowed Chair at The Graduate College of Social Work.[1] She has spent the past sixteen years studying courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy and is the author of four #1 New York Times bestsellers– The Gifts of Imperfection, Daring Greatly, Rising Strong, and Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and The Courage to Stand Alone. "
It's 6 1/2 hours of lecture, delivered to an audience primarily composed of middle aged women with children.
It's not what I expected and a rather unusual listen for me. I expected a more academic (give me the facts only) type of presentation but it ended up being a free-flowing, rambling and emotional presentation about the results of her research and about the details of dark emotions such as guilt, shame, vulnerability, pain, etc.
I liked the value offered by it overall and will be listening to her other work (the audiobook for Daring Greatly and Rising Strong) but in the first two hours, I found it obnoxious at certain points due to the rambling. The majority of her examples and teaching is done through the emotional life/POV of middle aged woman with children and her presentation & speaking style is geared towards the way women think and speak in private. Essentially the details of the powerful emotions are described in the way middle aged women experience and process things. This is not entirely clear for a straight man to follow 100%. eg. there is very little POV of men or young/single/older women involved. This is novel to me and I appreciate it, but it would have been better if she diversified her teaching and sources outside of fanbase (middle aged, Oprah watching women with children...) as guilt, shame, vulnerability, empathy, etc. are not emotions experienced by only people like her..
Brene is unusually charismatic, but her charisma is definitely female centric. Her sense of humor is very effective with her female audience and it is distinctly "feminine" type of humor, which relies on witticisms and is not that funny to me or men in general. Still, I appreciate the effort but I can't help but get the impression that her research is largely biased towards informing a certain group of people and isn't inclusive to the rest of us. Outside of her focus, her work should be most useful to married men with children as it would help them understand their wives better.
A final thought: Brene was most certainly a very attractive woman (personality and looks) when she was young swimmer/phD...
classic scene
-I'm probably not going to listen to Brene's other materials. Her content is far too bloated and I'm just going to go through the PDFs and epubs.
-On the Rosenberg workshop (2:45) he addresses the utility of anger (as an antithesis of passiveness) after a woman questions him. He admits the utility but he also points out that the emotional energy is best directed towards serving our goals as there is considerable wastage from anger as a portion is wasted in being "up in your head, playing punitive God".
-Source of anger : "What do you say when you talk to yourself". Conscious and sub-conscious.
-Translate all enemy images into needs. Enemy images -> the road to violent thinking, and then violent acts.
2:55 on Rosenberg's reaction to children getting their arms hacked off in Africa.
Bullets for Nonviolent communication
https://srinathramakrishnan.files.wordpress.com/2016/07/non-violent-communication-summary.pdf
- The Nonviolent communication workshop was excellent.
Many classic psych audiobooks on youtube:
lots and lots of Erich Fromm
* suppressing- lowers willpower.
My favorite scenes from "Last Samurai"
the best WW1 dogfights in film:
They should have done this movie in German....those accents LOL
beautifully delivered: